Advice from an old man turning 40...

As my 40th birthday approaches, I feel like I should do "something" to commemorate the milestone.  I am old enough I don't feel the need to "tie one on" with enough drinks to quench the thirst of a small city... I don't feel the need to jump out of an airplane... But you only turn 40 once... depending on your religious views.

In 20-30 years, who knows what technology will bring and if blogs will feel as antiquated as hand written notes.  On the off chance, the things I have written here survive and my kids, grand kids, etc actually have a chance to read it... I think I would like to share some advice, observations, and truths (about me).  Enjoy!

1. Have kids.  Get married and have kids.  You won't understand joy and love completely until you do.  This is what I know... others may say different, but I speak from experience.
2. Don't judge those who aren't married and don't have kids.  People do what is right for them.  Judgement should be left to those in the black robes and the special degrees.  Nobody else can wear it right.  
3. Find what you enjoy doing and figure out how to get somebody to pay you to do it.  Enjoying what you do for a living makes it much easier to get out of bed every day.
4. Take the time to say please and thank you.  More people will be willing to help and more happy to do it.
5. If you sweep the floor or run a company, take pride in what you do.  If you have no respect for your work, you can't expect others to either.
6. School is easier than work.  When you are in school, you can't wait to get your first job and start "real life".  Don't be in such a hurry.  School is a simpler time.  Enjoy it.
7. Don't be afraid to dance.  Regardless of how good or bad you are, somebody will think you are great and somebody will think you are awful.  When you are 40 and writing your blog, it won't matter what they thought, but you will remember how much fun you had.
8. Some people like to sing with the radio.  Some people sing in the shower.  I sing scales in the car when I am sleepy.  (Don't judge)
9. When something embarrassing happens to you... and it will... own it and laugh.  Things don't seem to bother you nearly as much when you are laughing with everyone instead of watching them laugh.
10. Fun is where you find it.  Find the person you love to spend your time with and tasks like making the bed are fun.
11. Laugh at yourself more than you laugh at others.  
12. Don't be mean.  The stain it leaves on you isn't worth it.
13. When somebody needs help, give it.  It will end up meaning as much to you as it does to them.
14. Don't email/text/voicemail when you are angry.  Waiting until you cool off will always result in your message carrying more weight than than your yelling.
15. When you are about to do something and your inner voice says "maybe this is a bad idea"... listen.  Then do it anyway if you want to!
16. Animals are wonderful, but they carry a lot of responsibility.  If you are the type to give the attention and love to an animal, you will get the love back ten fold.  If you aren't prepared to give the time and affection, visit other people with animals but don't own one.  It isn't fair to the animal.  This is a lesson I am still trying to learn.
17. Sometimes people don't want advice.. they just want to vent and they want you to listen.  Figuring out when each is happening is a special skill most people lack.
18. Don't go out of your way to point out the flaws in others... they do that well enough on their own.
19. I don't know if karma is real, but it feels real.  
20. If you spend your life trying to acquire "stuff", you eventually run out of places to put it all.  
21. The world is a full of terrible and wonderful things.  Don't be afraid to see both.  The wonderful is worth it.
22. Don't be afraid to live.  Don't be afraid to follow your dream and your heart.  The regret of never trying is far worse than that of failure.
23. Take the time to learn to cook.  When I think back to all the classes I took in high school... The cooking class has probably gotten the most use.  
24. Don't throw your gum on the ground... Getting gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe is awful... Don't be "that" guy/girl.
25. Don't smoke.  It is far harder to quit than it is to never start.  Don't do it because it isn't healthy.  Don't do it because it is dumb.  Unfortunately I learned this one the hard way and quitting was HARD.
26. Read... but don't read to the exclusion of living.  Balance is the key.  Don't live your life in a book.  Be the one people write books about.
27. Don't be afraid to offer advice, but be smart enough to know when someone isn't listening.
28. Listen to other's advice and then form your own opinion.  Many people will think they are an expert and still be wrong.
29. Embrace change instead of fearing it.  Change is an opportunity for something better.  
30. As cliche as it sounds... when one door closes, another opens.  Be looking for the open door instead of staring at the one that just closed.
31. Cry when you want to cry.  You will feel better after... and don't be ashamed to do it.  The people who matter will still be there after and won't care.
32. Beauty comes from your soul as well as your skin.  Take care of both.
33. Wear sunscreen on your feet.  Trust me on this.  
34. Take pictures.  You will never regret the pictures you took... only the ones you didn't.
35. People watch when you have the chance.  Few things are more entertaining.
36. Keep at least one thing from your childhood.  When you are old and gray, every time you look at your childhood bobble it will make you smile.
37. Spend the money on good razors... Money well spent.  (Good is the key word here.  Don't confuse it with expensive)
38. Work to live.  Don't live to work.
39. Say "I love you" as often as you feel it.  May you blessed to feel like saying it often.
40. Don't shop when you are hungry.  
41. Don't shop when you are completely full unless you have a list.  Otherwise you might come home with nothing.  (Happens to me all the time)
42. If you have the chance, travel to other countries.  Both the differences and similarities will be amazing.
43. Fly first class at least once.  
44. Not always... but being happy or sad is often a choice.  If you choose to be happy, you will be.  
45. Don't be afraid to sad.  Just don't get stuck there.
46. Prepare for the worst and plan for the best.  Just don't let preparing take over.
47. If you can't control the outcome, don't worry about what is going to happen.  Have a plan and then go on with your business.  Worrying too much only hurts you and doesn't change a damn thing.
48. When you are wrong, admit it.  Then try to not be wrong again.
49. When somebody else, even your competition, does a good job.  Say so.  Denying it only makes you look bad.
50. Jealousy is ugly.  It can consume you if you let it.  
51. If you are unhappy, you can change yourself or the situation.  You can't change other people.  Don't bother trying.
52. Call your mother.  She cleaned your butt more then you would like to admit.  Is a phone call really that hard?

The sunscreen on the feet one... yeah.  Just trust me.  

--C